Conflict – two or more people trying to occupy the same space or control the same resources.
Insight about conflict, wars, and fighting
The truth behind most if not all conflict is control – both want to control the same thing. (Money – Children – Time – ect.) Both want their way. Both want to be God.
The first conflict – The first war started in heaven: with Satan wanting to be like God – Worshiped instead of worshiping.
Examples:
- Adam and Eve: Wanting to be like God…
- Cain and Able: Cain wanted to worship the way he wanted instead of what God required.
- Pharaoh and Moses: Pharaoh’s gods vs Moses’ God.
- David and Goliath: Whose god is God? David’s God or Goliath’s
Today in the middle east there is war over whose God is God.
They both want to occupy the same space and control the same resources. That is what the war today is all about.
But, what I want you to learn what the war in your life, home, family, and workplace is really about. Both want to be gods, both want control over the same space or resources..
Learning to handle conflict correctly is the tunnel to intimacy.
When handled correctly you can be closer and more intimate than you were before.
1 Corinthians 14:33 (NKJV) “For God is not the author of confusion but of peace, as in all the churches of the saints.”
If God is not the author of confusion, who is? Satan and has been from the beginning. Every conflict can be resolved if both parties want to follow God’s plan for it. The goal of conflict is not to win and have victory, but to resolve the conflict.
Matthew 5:9 (TEV) “Happy are those who work for peace; God will call them his children!”
Are you willing to work for peace, to resolve the conflict? Do you really want to be happy?
Use the “Never Again List” during conflict:
(James 1:19, NKJV; Proverbs 21:23, NLT; Proverbs 16:24, NKJV; Proverbs 15:1-2, NKJV; Proverbs 18:21, NKJV; Ephesians 4:29, NKJV)
Proverbs 21:23 (CEV) “Watching what you say can save you a lot of trouble.”
• Never call each other names.
• Never raise your voice.
• Never get historical. Don’t keep bringing up the past.
• Never say “Never” or “Always”.
• Never threaten divorce or separation.
Mark 10:9 (AMP) “What therefore God has united (joined together), let not man (nothing) separate or divide.”
Learn to make anger work for you, not against you.
Ephesians 4:26-27 (CEV) “Don’t get so angry that you sin. Don’t go to bed angry and don’t give the devil a chance.”
The devil’s goal is to bring division and distance between you and God. Division brings fear while oneness brings love. The devil from the beginning knew if He could bring distance between God and Adam and Eve it would bring fear and fighting.
1 John 4:18 (NKJV) “There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love.”
In whatever area you have fear, that is where you need love. God wants to bring oneness and to overcome fear with love; the Devil’s goal is to bring separation- division that leads to fighting and fear.