Equity with Integrity = Healthy, Wealthy, & Lengthy Relationship!
Psalms 33:5 (NET Bible) The Lord promotes equity and justice; the Lord’s faithfulness extends throughout the earth
Psalm 89:14 (NET Bible) Equity and justice are the foundation of your throne. Loyal love and faithfulness characterize your rule
If you don’t have equity you don’t have clarity. Without equity there is no remedy. Equity is what you have deposited into a bank or build-up in your house. More importantly, here it’s what equity you have deposited in the other person’s life with whom you are in a relationship.
Many people in relationships try to withdraw equity from the other person without ever depositing or building equity in the other person’s life.
Example: If you put $1000.00 in your bank account you have $1000.00 equity or $1000.00 you can withdraw before you begin to overdraft. When you begin to overdraft, it will cost you. And if you keep doing it the bank might even close out your account or break off the relationship you have with the bank.
The same is true in many relationships. One person keeps trying to withdraw from the other person without making deposits or building equity in that person’s life. After a while it begins to take a toll on that person, and they will begin to withdraw because it drains them. If this does not change, many times they will even break off the relationship.You can allow your children, job, or even your hobby to drain you, but that’s your choice. You have the choice to change that.
But in a relationship, both need to intentionally add equity to the other person’s life regularly before withdrawing. Sometimes things come up and you have to withdraw all your equity at once. Just make sure when those times come, you put equity back into that person’s life as soon as possible. Do not act like you did not withdraw it all or forget you withdrew it all. It’s best to add it back and then some!!
Example: I recently went out of town for a week with 3 other guys. Two of those guys still had several young kids at home that their wives had to take care of totally while we were all out of town. Even though a few days were business, it was nothing compared to staying home taking care of children by themselves, and missing their husbands. When those guys got home they had used up all their equity and needed to start building some back and then some… Knowing these guys they did!
How do you build up equity?
- Take the spouse out to eat without the kids.
- Help with the kids and give the mother a break.
- Plan a weekend getaway.
- Tell her how much you love and appreciate her.
- Fill her car up with gas if you’re not already doing that.
- Send flowers.
You get the idea…
Wives, if you need to know how to build up equity in your husband’s life its easy…Remember all men have big egos!
- Brag on him. Tell him how proud you are of him.
- Tell him how good-looking he is.
- Simply have sex with him. Men think that’s the cure-all. They are not really very smart.
Love is not so much a duty, but a delight, it's not so much a feeling as a fact, it's a decision that leads to the right actions over and over until the feelings come. Love is the right decision put into action over and over again that will then lead to the right feelings. You can't feel your way into love, but you can act your way into love.
It's not a decision that makes a great decision...it's what you do after. Learn insights from 50 years of marriage. Through this book. I hope your marriage and relationships go from ordinary to extraordinary.
Pastor James Greer